I was planning to write this before the midnight strike but it took me much longer to remember last year than I anticipated. Everything that occurred seemed so much further away then I remember – all the good, the bad and the ugly that became the precedence of today. It’s true that the past make up the present and hence, predict the future. But what I can’t seem to wrap my mind around is exactly how the world turns. Out of the shell of our own actions, the rest of the world is beyond our control. Our perspectives may color it with different shades of yellow, black, or blue-grey, the world is still the way it is. However, all this has value for the relationship between me and the world or any one else and the world is based on the ancient rule – for every action, there is a reaction. Depending on your position of the story, relationships encircling the drama, how you see it, what you see, who you are, what you have experienced, and so forth, changes the reaction you will give in response.
Therefore, my reflections of 2008 hopefully will shine some light in how I came to the place I am now.
Spring (semester)
Last months at 1413…
I loved living there. I would love it more if I didn’t have school.
Summer
two favorite events come to mind – Houston and my birthday.
The 20-plus hours in the car definitely brought out some interesting conversation topics.
July was the last month I was out and about. Afterwards, I became a hermit.
Fall
Yup, definitely a hermit…
I did miss having my own space in a three-bedroom apartment with six girls. I guess I’ve always been one of those people who enjoy time alone as much as time with other people. However, the hiatus lasted longer and longer. Other hidden things started creping out – things I’ve put aside out of fear of another or annoyance for its very existence. A quarter-life crisis or just a hatred of the state I was in?
You know that saying “trust your guts”. Well, what if your guts are all screwed up. I mean, if we are who we are because of our past, our guts are shaped from the moldings of our past as well. What if my past isn’t all that reliable? What if my past could and should have been more but I just didn’t realize it? That would mean I’ve been trapped in this bubble, continuing on this cycle of thriving within its boarders. My view is limited by the same old street signs and run down houses. I realized that some of the things I regret I would never be able to change because that was beyond the realm of my bubble.
We are who we are by the choices we made in the situations that were given to us.
I neither like the situations nor the choices I made.
Maybe a time for a change…..?
As i pulled out of the complex, I leaned back for easy travel. Or so I thought for i was suddenly attacked by a heavenly scent. It mesmerized me, forcing me to turn to the passenger seat with a desire. My acknowledgment was followed by the knees shaking and locking as my hands became restless. I wanted to stop the car right there in the middle of the road. It took all my strength to hold myself until i reached a parking space. i turned and i smiled for i knew this was fate. This was destiny playing its hand, the three witches pulling its thread. I reached over and we touched. My eyes closed and my mouth opened as we touched again. My heart dropped to the floor. I knew right then and there, i knew. The love bugs, the cupid’s arrows filled the car. I knew. But there was a dilemma, I was shot with a bullet of confusion. What to do? What to do?Do i sit like a hippie and just enjoy and savor each and every flavor or do i take another bite out of this God-given sandwich? Oh, the glorious sandwich!!! made by heroes, steamed in new york. Who knew, who knew…….
yes, i am in love with a sandwich! Actually, i am in love with the sandwich shop that makes all the sandwiches because i love all the sandwiches i’ve tried so far. Sigh* only if i can find a guy who taste this sweet! or at least a guy who can make sandwiches this sweet! I need to marry a fireman!Yes, i need to marry a sandwich-making fireman!
i’m exhausted, unwilling to get up….or unable to. It’s sad to say that with much effort, tomorrow will be the last day to fill up the rest of my requirements. Do i have a lot left? Well, let us see.
First, before i start, it might be best to clarify the perquisites.
A. Must be eating food with at least one other person
B. Have to have a type of meat as one of the entrées
the rules have become pretty general for several reasons which will be shown in time.
Let’s start the count!
1. Sunday Thanksgiving brunch with both the American and the Korean congregation
2. Monday 1413 all-out, last minute, Thanksgiving close to midnight meal
3. Tuesday Yu’s – coined “thanksgiving” yet no turkey or ham. In our defense, we had beef that kind of looked like ham.
4. Thursday – actual Thanksgiving dinner with family/church members – pretty standard
5. Friday brunch – leftover with my fellow black Friday girls
Now, these are without doubt will be counted. But the controversy arises from the following….
6. Saturday brunch – more like good-bye breakfast….T.T
7. Monday SG dinner at rusans – sushi, turkey….i’m asian!
8. Wednesday wingnut – people sharing and giving thanks for each other’s company…..it works
so what do you think? …..latter three, count? no?
and just for fun, here are the ones i missed
9. Roger’s dinner on Friday. Sadly i could have made it to this one. Miscommunication is a beeeaach
10. Saturday breakfast – yeah, no…..me getting up that early????? i have breakfast for dinner!
Anyone up for having “thanksgiving” brunch and dinner with me 2mr?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?
I love food.
I will eat almost anything. But every once in a while, childhood gets the best of me and i have these cravings for this certain boxed meal snack.
I would love to say that it is good for you because of the…
vegetablestomato tomato-tasting paste
two kinds of cheese – yellow and white
bread
fruits fruit flavored drink
and candy( i actually forgot it came with sugar)
Then i would have a legit reason for eating this stuff but then I honestly don’t think so. I was too chicken to check.
I didn’t eat them often as child since my mom thought $4 for little pieces of bread and cheese was too much. I don’t even remember ever being full because of it. Yet, i crave it from time to time. It’s strange. I know that it doesn’t even taste good but……sigh*
Anyways, the cravings hit once again and i just had to go and buy some!
I enjoyed it!
washed it down with some
Had some more sugar with , also provided by the box.
Fully satisfied the craving but not the hunger. Of course i had something else to eat too!!
and LOOK!
!!!!
Now, only if i knew someone i can battle with…. Keep reading →
The language of the soul
The words of Aphrodite
The orator of human emotions
The base of our heartbeats
The…
The………well, you know
While I was rummaging through my ipod in the car, I stumbled upon a song I absolutely love. Then and there I made the decision to change my status on facebook as “Love Foolosophy by Jamiroquai”. Now i just had to hurry home.
On my way, I began to smile; I started remember that I once thought he was black.
I was so sure but my cockiness got the better of me. I thought i learned from my mistake of mistakenly thinking Norah Jones and Amy Winehouse were both blacks too. Thank goodness good music isn’t discriminated along race or ethnicity or nationality or religion or gender or anything.
Good music is just good music.
music I’currently breathing are :
Fall for you by Secondhand Serenade
Geek in Pink by Jason Mraz (live)
I’m Yours by Jason Mraz
Life is Wonderful by Jason Mraz ANYTHING by Jason Mraz
One of my favorite shows is the Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends. Its about this house where they foster in abandon and left-behind imaginary friends until they’re adopted again by another loving family. As much as i have this urge to get into the questions of legal responsibilities for these instantly created creatures, i’ll refrain.
What i did want to focus on was just the idea of your imagination actually coming alive. They’re huggable, lovable (some), furry and sometimes just damn delicious ( fat kids imagine drumsticks and hot dogs).
They have needs along with emotions and personalities of mischievous, naiveness or niceness. One of them is the nice guy. If a child imagines it, it comes alive. How wild is that?
So that got me thinking…
I’ve never had an imaginary friend but what if i did, what would he/she look like? act like?
not in specific order…
1. eats loves food!
2. sense of humor!!!!!
3. he’s a camera, i always try to “capture the moment” even if its not always possible
4. bold …in anything, everything
5. furry…maybe blue
6. a bit like hobbs..
i guess i dont that big of an imagination on these stuff.. Maybe with more thinking-time, i can add more to the list
